I LOVE YOU

What happen when someone tries to steal your boyfriend, and you'll end up having big fights with him?? What happen when someone is mental crazy adoooooores him besides you?? What happens when you tried to leave him because he cheats on you for three times, and he still comes back to you because you are the one for him?? ( get it) This last statement might contradict others perception but, when he comes back to you, crying like a 5 year old boy who have lost his mommy in a shopping mall.. hugging your arm begging you to not leave him.. what are you gonna do?? and its the first time he's ever done that..

And so.. Yes we do have our ups and downs. Our big moments and our deepest secret from each other. But both of us shared our deepest secret to each other without feeling anxiety or awkward. Its because we except each others mistakes.

Love is what God gave us. Even in love there are always walls that we need to break it in order to achieve what love really is. " Walau dalam percintaan, halangan itu tetap ada dan kesabaran juga tetap diuji dalam pelbagai cara yang dikehendaki oleh Allah s.w.t.. " :)

So, its not only in life that we are being tested by God, But also in love. Therefore we need extreme patience and prayers and ask god for help from his tests.

The guy that i love, that i have put lots of patience and understanding towards him, has crushed my heart by cheating on me. If it is once i'll forgive but three times is enough to make me wonder, Was the love real? If its not real, would he come back to me just to pujuk me and begged me to not leave him even though it would cost his life??

Not to brag about myself but, I am thankful that i have a huge IQ capacity, and could think accordingly. But i do not mix up religion and logic.

"Allah telah uji kesabaran aku dengan percintaan antara aku dan hafeez. Kerana dia la yang tahu betapa sayang nya aku terhadap hafeez dan betapa sayangnya hafeez terhadap aku. Hanya dia la yang maha mengetahui bahawa hanya hafeez la yang ku mahu hidup bersama. Hanya dia la yang tahu jika kami layak mewujudkan masa depan bersama. Dan hanya dia la yang tahu isi hati kami berdua."

Its been 2 years and 7 month were together. And i learn alot about him. There's always a reason why God made us fight. And there's always a reason why relationships don't work out. My relationship with hafeez has been going strong for 2 years and 7 month. And despite the things that happened, we're still going strong. ' If he comes back to you after what he did was really baaaad, and he stops doing it because he loves you, he's yours for eternity. But if he comes back to you without knowing that what he did was wrong, and he keeps on doing it, He is not yours for eternity.

Oe yea, before i forgot, i saw this one particular blog where i saw a picture of both of them. At first i was furious, but i seem to be imune to it. Because, he's with me now, and she's the one who keeps on getting her revenge. So, i actually kesian kat dia. How desperate she is to find guys to love her, to give her the attention she wants. And how badly she wants a guy, boyfriend orang pun jadi jer tuk dia. Jgn jak bapak org tu pun dia nak.. So typical P.E.L.A.C.U.R... I'm actually not mad at you babe, but kesian jer..Its because you got no life..Pity...... Janji ada butu cukup kan..

Anyway..my love, my darling...my one and only biey... :)

I LOVE YOU BIEY...

MY HAFEEZ

RIANAHAFEEZ

Till then,

Stay tune;

Deekay.. xD

Sahur

First time buka sahur in a university. Selama 3 tahun in uitm..i never sahur..malas punya pasal la..hihihihi..

Fighting for my economics

Its weird when you have to sit for the same subject again. But this time, economics is not like my previous MTC099 eco. No, this is much harder than that, because of the different sylabus final exam. The content are all the same, but the questions are different. How i wish this eco would be like before, lots of counting. My eco this time has lots os grahping to do. The things that we don't really learn in mtc099, itu la yg di tekankan. All those oligopoly kinked shaped graph, those monopolistic, monopoply and monopolistic competition. Adoi~ eco eco..you're the only subject tjat could make me go mad. xD..anyway..goodluck for me during my finals. Really really really need to score on all my papers. ;p

A very happy birthday to a very special someone..

Today was a tiring day for me. Because yesterday was a massive hoohaa of funness and enjoy-ness.. Minus the awkward day i had for my buka puasa with my friends and biey.

Anyway, i arrived in UITM puncak alam yesterday night. My biey send me after i went to my baby nephews birthday party. Was really tired by then, and i did not study for my office automation quiz today, but i managed to cover everything up before the quiz. And nasib la boleh jawab.. =)

Puasa today, and i went to buy some food at the rafflesia Cafe. There were lots of people selling food and also some of them are UITM students, as in event managment course and also my course, the office managment course.. =).. But they were all seniors.

Haiyaaaa.. I am strugling for my economic test this thursday. I CAN DO IT!!! and on the 7th of september is my business quiz2.. Damn~.. This thursday i have to send my 100 marks assignment, the human communication.. Next, next week my mock meeting.. a week before my finals, my group project for human communicationa and my economic assignments, not to mention the never ending quizzes and tests!!!.. Ya Allah.. help me with this journey.. =)

Well, today is my biey's birthday, i miss him..lol..minus the angry feeling i had towards him when i caught him cheating on me.. He's an ass..Well HE IS!

So, we went to see a movie, UP! it was so damn funneyh!! went to see the movie with nieja and AJ. Reen could not make it, because, urg kol2 nda reply..ngong!! my biey belanja all of us to a movie, and something happened during the movie that only four of us know..hahahahhaa!!!
mmm~ 1906 hot dogs! hahaha!!!

So anyway, went to seremban buka puasa there with my biey's friends. After that, we went karaoke and he sent me to nieja's home.. was really sleepy that time.. :)

And kesian my biey, dia pun kepenatan this bha. Hehehehe.. so kesian, after sending me home after the buka puasa in seremban, the next day he went to shah alam again and we go jalan2. And that night, he send me to puncak alam and after that he went back to seremban. He arrived in seremban around 1.30 in the morning. So kesian my biey.. Next time bg chance la, i la yg pg drive p seremban. Tggu i ada kereta luk..hihihihihi...

So anyway, today i don't know why the hell i can't log on to facebook. Maybe its under maintanence.. hurmm... maybe, cz i'm addicted to facebook!!!! hahahahaha

Biey, I MISS YOU!!! wahahahahahaha.. but at the same time i feel like i want to punch your face.. yea~..hihihi..anyway

stay tune ayte!!
Deekay

The heart is kicking back to me

I am actually in tears..listening on this particular song. It brings back so much memory... I'm the person who never admits i'm soft, has lost her fighting aura on this particular day. This is the first time i became so lonely..Tears over flowed my face, making all my suffering in my heart comes out in tears and in tranquility.. I just can't afford to handle this burden once again in my heart..Too many obstacles that is in my way...and everytime i get through each and every obstacles, there will always be circumstances to undertake..my heart is actually full of sadness and no one knows..only me, myself..and my fragile heart..

There's so many people who hurt me, and i just kept it in. I never cried, never even let my heart touch on her soft side, but let ego take its toll on me..

I can't find ways to beat this sincerity that is coming from my fragile heart, but just to bear it with my soul.

The gift from god came, and light my way with love. I love that person so much and i sacrifice everything by being faithful to him. But all i get back from him is being cheated, three times. I do forgive, but i can't forget. three times is enough to make me wonder was the love that god me real?? or is it just a figment of my imagination..

I can't do anything but just let tears flow from my face. Each and every person that i have ever loved gave me the same results to my fragile heart.. So i left them, and move on. But my heart is taking its toll on me, by making me lonely.

My used to be bestfriend Suria did things which made my trust against her fall apart like a tea cup glass broken into pieces. Gaining my trust back is mending those broken tea cups shattered glass back into pieces, with those itsy bitsy part of it. I loved her so much because she was my bestfriend, but it was shattered because she lied to me in the beginning antil the very end. I forgive, but i never forget.

Cruel things ended in my heart, leaving ego taking its toll on me. Leaving my soft side gone. But now my heart is taking its toll and i can't fight it anymore, because i am deeply wounded in my heart.

I lost everything...

But now i have friends, who cheer my heart up. But not 24 hours. But still they could cheer my day up..

Being sad everyday is like knowing your parents died. So i take this as a lesson, and hope to be imune to it..

And pray that i will have a better life in the future, a better love and friendship.. =)

Stay tune..
Deekay...
=)